Friday, January 20, 2012

BamBam The Testicle Puncher


JANUARY 19–Meet Savannah “Bambam” Rios, accused testicle puncher. The Utah woman, 24, is facing several felony charges after a bizarre attack last week on a man she recently dated. Rios allegedly confronted the man last Wednesday after he accused her of swiping some of his belongings. The victim told police that he went to meet with Rios at a Salt Lake City residence, where he “was lead to a back backroom” where she was seated on the bed. The male victim–identified only by the initials “G.A.”–said that Rios slapped him several times, pulled out a knife, and asked him, “You wanna die?”
That’s when things got weird. Rios ordered “G.A.” to remove his clothes. After he complied, Rios grabbed the man’s belt and “wrapped it around her hand, and hit him several times in the ‘balls.’” After pleading for his life, Rios allowed him to get dressed. She then directed him to drive to his home, where she allegedly forced him to give her a DVD player, camera, and phones. On the way to the residence, Rios stabbed at “G.A” with the knife, police charged. While at the man’s home, Rios “observed a bank statement…and ordered him to the bank.” The victim, who withdrew $500 from his account, subsequently escaped and “ran for help at a nearby police station.”


This bitch BamBam is making Lorena Bobbitt look like the Easter Bunny. I mean come on Bams, wrapping a belt around your hand and going junkyard on some poor guy's coinpurse, that's a little much even for a terrifying, neck tatted criminal like yourself. I'm smitten with the fact that she demanded the guy's DVD player. Sure she's probly gonna sell it on the street, but I have a vision of BamBam having a black and white movie marathon on the couch in an oversized tank top while her acrylic nails dry and she tells the story over the phone to her best bitch:

"Fuckin' right I used my Gucci belt mama. I fuckin' whaled on his leettle ballsack for sumpin' like 20 minutes. I took heez DVD player and now I'm watchin Blazing Saddles on Blu-Ray. Dat Mel Brooks is funny fo realllll. You wanna get sumpin' to eat lata, like around Five terty, I just gotta huff tha rest of dis glue and den I'll hop in tha shower."

Fucking BamBam.

1 comment:

  1. Really? After meeting Savannah, I believe this story is just a "bit"exagerated! First Bam Bam is not into guys as far as I know, and I've never seen her lash out at anyone who didn't deserve it, so what did this "man" do? What did Mrs.Bobbitt's husband do to provoke her? He raped her and got what any man deserves who rapes a woman. Now Bam Bam is about 5'1 and 130 pounds, she's tough but wow she must have super human strength to over power this "man" (GA) hiding behind the rape shield laws with not giving his name? But if women in Utah defend themselves they are Bitches. What ever happened there are two sides to a story yet only one slanted side is given here.

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