Daily News - This costume may not be the scariest thing to wear to a Halloween party on Monday, but the price tag will certainly give you a fright. Priced at $1 million, this human slinky could be the most expensive fancy dress costume on earth. The item is currently listed on eBay with the seven-figure 'Buy it Now' price tag, with 10 per cent going to the American Cancer Society.
If anyone says this is a stupid costume they are just jealous that they can't fucking afford it. Sure, doing the human slinky is basically just glorified ribbon dancing but it's a skill, and skills are in short supply this day and age. The days of learning a useful trade or becoming the lovable town blacksmith are over and done with. The only thing kids know how to do nowadays is get obese, gay bash, and play video games in their skidmarked underwear. Basically the least skilled generation ever. So, whoever is in that goddamn human slinky costume KUDOS TO YOU, PAL. You're showing what a little hard work and dedication can do. Besides, 1 million bucks isn't even that bad of a price tag for this beauty, you'd make that back in 6 months tops by absolutely crushing every talent show you ever entered. If the guy swallowing knives and juggling flaming bowling pins thinks he's a lock for the blue ribbon wait 'til he gets a load of Sexual Human Slinky. If the SHS is entering the contest he's 1.Giving all the judges a raging erection and 2. Blowing the competition outta the fucking atmosphere. Pure showmanship at it's finest. I'd give up everything I'm good at to be able to "slink" like this for even 30 seconds. Let's call a spade a spade, double knotting my shoelaces and building post-Katrina gingerbread houses are hardly skills to begin with anyway.
I could be almost as good at slinking as this girl is at Leap Frog.
Wow. Least amount of effort ever. She didn't even fucking try. She gave up faster than Kim Kardashian's marriage counselor. It's called LEAP frog, bitch, not Slide-into-my-asshole-and-balls-at-full-speed Frog. Like I said, kids today can't even master a skill as simple as hopping over someone's back. Long live the slinky.
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