Thursday, January 12, 2012

Justin Bieber Wedding Dance Is Either Awesome Or The Stupidest Shit Ever

I can't decide whether or not I love or loathe this fucking performance. I think I like it for the first 4 seconds and then it just careens downhill from there into a ravine of darkness and humiliation. Sure, it takes some balls to pull off a performance like this on your wedding day, but it's an absolute shame that this bastard was sober enough to do so. It's your wedding day buddy, have a dozen whiskey sours, pick the bride up, cross the threshold, lay her down on the bed and cross your fingers and toes that your dick gets hard. Enough with these choreographed dance routines. They're just symbolic of what your next 30 years looks like with this bitch. You'll be doing all the work while your wife is sitting down with a glass of champagne just straight laughing at you.

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